Robert Newman gets to grips with the wars and politics of the last hundred years - but rather than adhering to the history we were fed at school, the places oil centre stage as the cause of all commotion. This innovative history programme is based around Robert Newman's stand-up act and supported by resourceful archive sequences and stills with satirical impersonations of historical figures from Mayan priests to Archduke Ferdinand. Quirky details such as a bicycle powered street lamp on the stage brings home the pertinent question of just how we are going to survive when the world's oil supplies are finally exhausted.

I did a book recently, based upon my experiences with the whole process of having a baby. I have three children, so the material came thick and fast. Most of it smelt nasty.

I thought it would be fun to have a caption competition using the artwork from the book. The prize being a signed copy of the book. Deadline for entries 1st April.

If you could email me your caption to stik@stik.biz I will notify you if you have won, then if you send me your details, I'll get it in the post to you.

The devil makes work for idle hands that have Photoshop and an ear for a silly pun....

Gosh, aren't people weird? I was asked to do a caricature of someone. So I told them the cost etc, which was fine. Anyhow I did it, she liked it. So I said I'd give her a nice glossy print of it. That's when things turned a bit chilly. She asked if she could have a "real" copy.

I said that I had drawn it in a computer... She went nuts. Apparently she works all day with computers, and "hates" them.

A bit strong I thought, I wasn't asking her to date a computer. So I politely told her that the Telegraph, The Big Breakfast...etc didn't seem to mind, and that my medium was just as valid as pen and ink. I think she thought the computer drew my work...

Then the other day, I asked my 50 year old brother, why he didn't have a computer... My goodness, you would have thought I'd have asked him to sleep with a corpse. He actually turned his back on me and trembled with rage. I thought his spine might explode from inner termoil... I think I'll send him some Tesco computer vouchers, stand back and see what happens. :o)

What's up with people? Ho-Hum.... I actually think I've tapped my keyboard so much that the DNA it's collected makes it more human than me.... Back to work I guess.

1. She's lazy. She gets all the animals to do her work. Using squirrels to do the washing up, I mean... It's a wonder the dwarfs didn't get Weil's disease.
2. She steals all of the 7 dwarfs beds, and gives them one pillow to sleep on, what sort of house guest is that? God knows what she did to their toilet...
3. As soon as a better offer comes around the corner, she's off, even though she's never met this guy. Good job the dwarves didn't tell her about the diamond mine, she would have fleeced them out of that as well.
4. She's too damn white, anyone that white has to be a Nazi or a vampire..Or both. MJ anyone?
5. She thinks nothing of breaking and entering, then when she's discovered she takes the piss out of their names..
6. Anyone who doesn't chew their food properly and can't even eat an apple without choking and going into a coma has to be slightly evil... Don't ask me why... I'm still mad she made the dwarves fight over a pillow.
7. She uses her feminine charms to get what she wants, from everyone. And what she clearly wants, is money and a high position in society. She is so ruthless she feigns he own death to get the man of her dreams. Did he survive her?...No one will know.
8. She played Dopey for the sucker he was...Ultimately breaking his heart. He probably got Grumpy to shoot him when she left.
9. She power dresses. She has shoulder pads that would put an American footballer to shame. Just like her evil clone... Maggie Thatcher...She was eerily white too....hmmmmm.